The Pro's + Con's of Becoming an Au Pair
The Pro’s and Con’s of Becoming an Au Pair!
So, maybe you’ve heard of something like this, but you don’t really know anything about it or what it involves. If you’re like me, maybe you’ve got a gap year or an itch to travel, a desire to find yourself, but there’s something holding you back. Maybe you are a bit intimidated to fully delve into a new country, experience and life as a young, solo female traveler. Maybe you want to have the security and familiarity of having someone you know in the area to help you navigate. Maybe, you’re just looking for a new experience, and one of your family members recommended you become an Au Pair as an inexpensive way to immerse yourself into this opportunity. These are all really good reasons as to why you should consider becoming an Au Pair.
Interested in learning more about what it means to be an ‘Au Pair’? Check out Here's the Low-Down: Au Pair, what?
If you’re not really sure what an Au Pair is, you can refer to my low-down on becoming an Au Pair post for more info. To sum it up quickly, as an Au Pair, you have the opportunity to move to another part of the world (often another country) to live with a family (often with younger children) to exchange culture, language and life for a short period of time. Your responsibilities would likely involve taking care of the child(ren) for certain hours during the week, and have the ability to explore the surrounding areas on the weekends/in your free-time.
It’s both a very rewarding and (hear me when I say this) can be a very trying experience. As I’m currently working and experiencing life as an Au Pair (and with VIPkid), I’d like to give you, perspective Au Pairs, an inside look an insight into what this full experience might entail (that goes behind the scenes of instagram worthy moments). Like with almost every experience in life, I truly believe that you have to go through the experience yourself to fully understand what something is like, but I hope that this can maybe prepare you a little bit for some of the realities; both very good and bad.
Let’s start with the con’s to get them out of the way so we can end this all on a positive note!
Cons:
- The first few days can be chaotic. You’ll be getting into the swing of the specific ways your new family does things, their schedule, their routines, etc. They’re going to do simple things differently from the way you normally do. You’re going to unintentionally do something that they don’t particularly like, and the knee-jerk reaction from the family might not be the most graceful. But it will get better. Once you get through a few days, and a few weeks of their way of life, it’ll be like water under the bridge.
- The kids might not be super accepting of you at first. This might be true especially for those kiddos that have cycled through several different Au Pairs over the years. I mean, imagine getting really emotionally connected with a great person, loving them, and then having them leave after a certain time period. Walls are inevitably formed by these sweet kids, and them taking a while to like you is nothing personal against you. If they seem more interested in watching TV than listening to or playing a game with you, sit with them while they watch. Gain their trust. The walls should soften if you invest in time with them even if they don’t seem interested.
- In a similar way from the previous point, the kids might be SUPER critical of you, especially if you’re from another culture or speak another language. Your host child might be the first (and sometimes least graceful) at pointing out all the ways you’re doing something wrong, whether that be from walking down the street, to talking to strangers and pronouncing words. Again, try not to take this personally. Their criticism (though sometimes not necessarily handled in the best way) might actually be helpful to keep you from sticking out like a sore thumb, and assimilate better into the everyday interactions with other locals.
- A language barrier could make it difficult for you to communicate. It can be hard when you try to explain a situation or behavior to a parent in a language that is their second language. They might not be able to fully understand the situation and likely won’t necessarily handle in how you might expect. Especially if they speak to their children in their native language, you might not even know if the situation is being addressed.
- Your plans are at the mercy of your host family. That being said, if you’re a rigid planner, you should be prepared to be flexible and available to do what your family needs you to do. Someone might get sick, or throw a tantrum, or a parent’s work might get in the way, and as a result, you might have to sacrifice meeting up with expat friends, traveling around the city or other alone time you were originally counting on. It is your responsibility to hold your commitment to take care of the children first, before any of your own desires to travel.
- If you have dietary restrictions, it could be difficult for the family to accommodate them as much as you’d like. It’s definitely not a lack of respect for you, they might just have different cultural norms that make it difficult for them to change the way they prepare food for the family. It might be helpful for you to go to a grocery store and pick up a few snacks that you know you can eat on your own. Maybe do some research into the culture, food and region that you’re planning on going to, to see whether it would be too difficult for you to adjust your diet.
- The pay is relatively low for the amount of work you might have to complete. The technical term for it is called “pocket money”, and it’s relatively accurate considering the amount you receive will likely only be enough to fit into your pocket, for small things. This is relatively reasonable especially if you consider the other amenities and resources your host family might offer you during your stay with them. Sometimes, you might also be able to find an alternative job while you have free time during the day
Okay. I hope that wasn’t too bad for ya. Now for some positives….
Pros:
- You get the insight into the city from a local’s perspective. Being able to live with people who are VERY familiar with the area (and it’s local history and hot pots) gives you a personal private tour experience unlike anything money can buy. On top of that, with being fully immersed in a location for an extended period of time, you yourself have an opportunity to find your own favorite spots that are outside the confines of the most popular travel blogs and tourist guidebooks. And even more cool, if you have the chance to return or give advice to other people traveling to the area, you’ll be able to share that authentic experience with them!
- You gain another family. With the serious time and love that you have invested into the children and the family as a whole, there will likely forever be some connection between you. This is truly a unique experience that no one else could relate with you about, on the same level. The time and effort that you poured into great care, and loving the family will definitely end up rewarding you in return. Plus, getting to come back to see them all again is a major bonus.
- Learning a new language is so much easier when you’re immersed in it. I honestly never even considered one day studying Italian. It just isn’t widely used where I’m from. But upon hearing how beautifully it flowed (and admittedly partially out of necessity), I started teaching myself, with the help of a few others, some Italian. This experience in itself set off, like an atomic bomb, a realization for me of how important language is; even my very native tongue that I so often take for granted. Even though I’m an English teacher! Being on the other side and placed in a location where I was fully immersed into the language was a bit frustrating at first, but helped me learn so much faster than if I was easily surrounded with my mother language.
- Accommodations are all taken care of. This is honestly something that stressed me out for a long time when looking at the possibility of traveling internationally. But this is a really nice opportunity to not have to worry about where you’re going to be sleeping, and you won’t be spending all of your money on hostels or hotels. Granted, sometimes if there’s additional food that you want, you have to take care of that on your own. Otherwise, you often have your food covered and prepared for you as well when you're with the family. Also, you get to say that you LIVED in a foreign country! That’s pretty cool!
- Your weekends are for adventures! Sometimes, you might be able to go out with the family; an opportunity to go to places/do things that you might not do (or think of doing) on your own. Not only do you get to spend additional quality time with the family, but you also get to make amazing memories with them along the way! Other times, you can organize your own trips to explore some local hidden gems like a local, or take a quick journey to a travel hot spot that isn’t too far away! Being in Europe, from the US, there are so many amazing destinations that are a cheap bus/train/flight away.
- Self exploration is real, obtainable and SO necessary. This experience pushes you in unique ways. Not only are you going to be taking care of some children and learning through that, but the things that you have an opportunity to discover about yourself are incredibly endless. Doing something like this might require you to step outside of your comfort zone; ultimately rewarding. The perspective you gain about yourself, your culture, your beliefs is so important and will definitely have a lasting impact on your life.
- The world is a bit smaller for you. You have the opportunity to make friends from all over the world. This truly is up to the individual, but getting involved with Au Pair group chats, expat chats, Couchsurfing events, staying in hostels, allows you the opportunity to meet people from all over the world. The friendships that you might unsuspectingly find in them can be so valuable. They might even give you another insight into a culture, practice, or reason to visit the unique destination they call “home”.
There you have it. I think that sums up the majority of it for now! Either way you look at it, it’s an experience that you have to be in for yourself to fully understand, value, or relate to. I can only speak from my experiences, but each one is unique and different. I feel as though I was relatively blessed to have a sweet and respectful family that was open to communicating with me, but there can still be some road bumps. I hope that in sharing my perspective, you’re a bit more informed about this opportunity and all that it entails.
If you have been an Au Pair before and have your own pro’s/con’s or input to add, I would love to hear from you!
Hello there, friend… I am an adventurer, photographer and enthusiast of living life to the fullest. I enjoy writing stories to document various lessons I’ve learned throughout my life. Similarly, I love using photography to capture a precious moment in time as a way to revisit it. I hope you are able to find something here you enjoy, even if it is just following along my journey. I truly do appreciate you!
